I got a call this past Monday from Jackie.  She wanted to get together for lunch.

For those of you that are not regular readers here, Jackie is the younger sister of my girlfriend or ex-girlfriend ( I don't know how the Hell to describe or write about this crap) of Rhonda, who passed away in March of this year. 
(more:    Slaughtered, Gutted and Heartbroken)

I've known Jackie and attempted to date her for a long time before I had met Rhonda, although we never actually did go out.  A call from her was quite unusual and out of the ordinary.

I arrived at the restaurant around 1:00 in the afternoon and was informed by the Maitre'd that my 'party' had already arrived and was waiting for me.

As he ushered me over to the table where Jackie was and I first saw her, just for a second - just a split second, my mind saw Rhonda.  I don't know why since they really never looked similar, but I guess they look more like one another than I had realized and definitely more so compared to everyone else in the world.  It was rather an unsettling feeling.

I sat down and we made some small talk for a few minutes.

Finally Jackie tackled the topic 'at hand' which she wanted to tell me and the true reason behind our luncheon.

Apparently her Mom has not been in good physical condition in general and the sudden death of her eldest daughter Rhonda, did not help matters.  She had been in and out of hospital for the past month and Jackie felt that it was in her Mom's best interests for her to move back home to Halifax to be able to help her out and take care of her.

"I wanted to tell you in person since we kind of have a bond together through Rhonda." she explained, almost apologetically.

I sort of thought this whole conversation was a little surreal.  Actually quite bizarre.  I mean, why the Hell should I care if she moves home or anywhere else for that matter.  It's not like we are close, we never actually dated and only hung out together for a few months really.

The rest of our lunch went by rather quiet and uneventful.  Not totally surprising since we both have very little in common with one another.

Once we left the restaurant, I gave her a hug and wished her the best as we said our goodbyes.

As I was heading towards my car for some unknown reason I suddenly became profoundly sad.  Extremely so.

I then realized that really Jackie was the only tie in this world that I had left to Rhonda, and now she was leaving.  I had actually met Rhonda though Jackie and once we started dating, we all were a little family for a short period.  Those were the happiest times in my life.

When Rhonda died, Jackie could understand and feel the same loss as I did.  She was really the only one that could.  My friends were supportive and tried to empathize, but really they could never know the pain in my loss.  I mean, I don't blame them, how could they?  

Now Jackie was leaving, and the cold true state of finality was thrust upon me.

I got to my car and noticed there were a couple of tears on my face, which I quickly wiped away.  Damn it.   I really thought I was over this  !@!@&^*@.  

I hate this.